Death & Cremation

Starring: Jeremy Sumpter, Brad Dourif, & Debbon Ayer
Rating: 2 out of 5 stars

From Peter Pan to a bullied outcast, Jeremy Sumpter continues to show his tremendous versatility as an actor in Death & Cremation. This cast was the whole reason I wanted to see this movie, but unfortunately it falls well short of my expectations. Stanley (Brad Dourif) is a loner and a serial killer who runs the perfect business for getting rid of evidence, a crematorium. He's a lonely man and nothing exciting happens to him until a loner named Jared (Sumpter) starts working for him. This film tries very hard to be something it's not and that's creepy. Death & Cremation isn't about blood and gore, but rather moves very slowly and methodically in order to try and freak us out, but sadly it doesn't. Stanley and Jared aren't guys you're going to be scared of, more like two guys you'd like to hang out with and that's the problem. The audience can relate to them and isn't scared of them at all. That being the case this film should have gone the other way and been extremely bloody and disturbing, but it's not that either. The story is bland and the movie is slow, but the cast is amazing. Brad Dourif plays a psychopath better than anyone and it really wouldn't surprise me if he is in fact a serial killer. Here he's teamed with one of my absolute favorite actors, who is also superb, but they're giving their all in a slow, sloppy film, that just doesn't cut it.

Primal Fear (1996)

Starring: Richard Gere, Laura Linney, & Edward Norton
Rating: 4 out of 5 stars

Based on a best selling novel by William Diehl, Primal Fear stars Richard Gere, as a high powered defense attorney, who decides to take on what appears to be an open and shut case, just so he can get his face on Television. The case is intriguing and did what seldom movies can do, surprise me. There is an ending to this film that will just completely blow you away. As for the rest of the film, it was extremely entertaining thanks to the outstanding cast, that features both Richard Gere and a very young, Edward Norton, in one of his first roles. At the time Norton was a no-name, while Gere was the big star. Who would have thought that eventually Norton would become the bigger name? Well, anyone who saw this film and the absolutely tremendous performance Norton gives. To be honest, most court room dramas don't surprise me. You can always tell if the suspect is guilty or innocent, and there is usually some kind of twist in the story. Primal Fear was not so cut and dry, I kept going back and fourth on the suspects guilt or innocence myself. That's because this is a powerful movie, with an unrivaled cast, written by a professional novelist, as opposed to some amateur screenwriter. Primal Fear is a perfect example of what it takes to create a great movie, and after you watch it, let me know if you can figure out where the title comes from. It took me a while to get it, but eventually I did.

Batman: Gotham Knight

Starring: Kevin Conroy, Jason Marsden, & Hynden Walch
Rating: 2 out of 5 stars

I don't really care for animated movies...I like superheroes even less, but Batman is the exception, and when I read that this film bridges the gap between Batman Begins and the Dark Knight, while being written and directed by some of the same people, I got excited. Gotham Knight is a collection of six stories that supposedly tell us what Batman was up too, prior to battling the Joker in the Dark Knight. What I really love about Nolan's Batman movies is how realistic they are, and while Gotham Knight uses the same names and story line, it is anything but realistic. These stories are downright childish and boring. It's like reading Batman's diary and seeing his conversations and what he did at work today, some stories were better than others, but I was pretty much reading Batman's Twitter and it was as dull and simplistic as could be.

Tower Heist

Starring: Ben Stiller, Eddie Murphy, & Gabourey Sidibe
Rating: 3 1/2 out of 5 stars

On the surface, Tower Heist appears to be nothing more than a stupid comedy about some pissed off employees, getting back at their rich bosses, that's kind of why I didn't want to see it. This movie did surprise me though, aside from it's lame jokes, there is substance here, which include a pretty good story and an interesting cast. Ben Stiller is terrific as usual, but Eddie Murphy was not. I was never a big fan to begin with, but in recent years he has completely lost the ability to be funny and carry a film, the way he did with the Beverly Hills Cop series. Usually Murphy is an asset, injecting humor into an otherwise dry plot, but here his appearance actually takes away from the film. His character is both forced and uninteresting and I'd go as far as to say that this movie would have been better, if Eddie Murphy's character was just eliminated altogether. As I said earlier, the previews don't do this film justice and if you base what you're going to watch solely on previews, than you probably didn't see Tower Heist, and you're missing out. It is an interesting movie, that's different, and has a couple of twists in the story. Not an award winner by any means, but it's certainly something that will entertain you for a couple of hours.

Insomnia (2002)

Starring: Al Pacino, Robin Williams, & Hilary Swank
Rating: 4 out of 5 stars

Insomnia was the second major motion picture by acclaimed writer/director, Christopher Nolan. Even in the most early stages of his career, it's easy to see his genius, that's why so many big stars wanted to work with him right away. Insomnia is the least well known of all his films and does lack some of the things that have become Nolan's trademark, but it's still a terrific film. The story follows two L.A. Detectives sent to a remote part of Alaska, where the sun doesn't set for six months and then doesn't rise for six months. They're there to solve a brutal and calculated murder, but circumstances lead them down a different path. Despite being one of the best Hollywood has to offer, I haven't really been much of a Pacino fan. To me, it seemed as though he had lost something with age, his performance in Insomnia proved me wrong. Terrific is not the word for what Al Pacino was and he's not the only genius Nolan surrounded himself with. This film is incredibly well written and being the perfectionist that he is, Nolan got only the best people to star in it. It's not the kind of Nolan film, we've been spoiled with over the past 10 years, but Insomnia is a great story, with an unbelievable cast and in my opinion is a must see.

Jack Ketchum's The Lost

Starring: Marc Senter, Michael Bowen, & Ed Lauter
Rating: 1 out of 5 stars

Jack Ketchum is a famed horror novelist, but as far as turning his stories into film is concerned, so far, it hasn't been very successful. The only film based on his writing that I enjoyed, was The Offspring. The most recent one I watched, The Lost, was by far his worst. The story is about two detectives following a guy they know is a budding serial killer, a man who they suspect in a previous crime. With no evidence against him all they can do is watch him. First off this film is very slow moving, to point where I almost turned it off. Second, the main character, Ray (Marc Senter), is a complete and utter moron. I don't know if the character was written that way or if the actor playing him was just that bad, but this guy was not believable at all! The story is rather hard to follow as well, mainly because throughout it, people just keep making statements about what they've seen or what they know, without providing those same details to the audience. Isn't the point of a good mystery to make the audience think and figure things out for themselves instead of just having someone tell them everything? This movie was slow, poorly acted, and on top of that just plain stupid! Don't waste your time on it.

Jack Ketchum's The Girl Next Door

Starring: Blythe Auffarth, Madeline Taylor, & Daniel Manche
Rating: 2 out of 5 stars

Jack Ketchum's 1989 novel and the subsequent film are based on one of the most infamous sex crimes in American history. The crime was truly horrific, unfortunately the film is equally as bad. The story is about a young girl who is living with a relative for the summer, a twisted and evil relative, who not only abuses the girl, but allows the neighborhood children to take advantage of her as well. The story is more than a little disturbing, but it's made worse by a film that is ridiculously tedious and boring. This story was much too straight forward and simplistic to make for a good movie, especially when they're choosing to focus on the crime itself. The one bright spot in this movie is soap actor, Daniel Manche. I'd never even heard of him prior to this film, but he was really great. It's a shame this film was so bad and cost him the recognition he deserved, but this kid was on target and really displayed the emotions that the viewers were feeling. There is another film about this crime, which focuses specifically on the ensuing trial resulting from the crime. It's called An American Crime, and while I already know the outcome, I have to see it, because it stars one of my favorite actors, Jeremy Sumpter. I can only hope that that film is more interesting than this one was.

Ted

Starring: Seth MacFarlane, Mark Wahlberg, & Mila Kunis
Rating: 4 out of 5 stars

Even though Ted is a Seth MacFarlane movie, I was hesitant to see it. A thirty year old guy who lives with his foul mouthed teddy bear?! I was expecting another Paul, but MacFarlane isn't British, and THIS film was hysterical. Ted is a raunchy real life living teddy bear, who combines the traits of every MacFarlane character. It was pretty awesome, sometimes you saw him as Peter, other times Brian, and so on. The real surprise of this film was Mark Wahlberg. I can't remember ever seeing him in a comedy and I wasn't sure his rather dry personality would work with MacFarlane's brand of humor, but he fit in like he's been doing this for years. I mean he was Marky Mark, he must have some personality in there somewhere! As for the story, it's not much different than a really good episode of Family Guy. Of course, it a lot more raunchy and it's not animated, but there are certainly many parallels, and defiantly some hysterical lines. It's not the kind of film I usually go for, at points, it's more than a little stupid, but I'd be lying if I didn't say I laughed my ass off throughout the film.

The Shortcut

Starring: Drew Seeley, Shannon Woodward, & Dave Franco
Rating: 3 1/2 out of 5 stars

The Shortcut isn't the typical B-movie slasher film you'd expect it to be. The movie actually has a plot, a decent story to follow, and a great cast. A great cast can be the difference in a film like this and they defiantly did a great job here. For decades, people had been disappearing from the woods behind Hartley Elementary and no one is sure why, but after something scared the shit out of his little brother, Derek (Drew Seeley) is going to find out what it is. Shannon Woodward of the Riches and James Franco's little brother give strong performances and some comic relief in support of Drew Seeley. Seeley is a newcomer to me, but his intensity was contagious and really helped me get into this film. I also really liked how they moved between modern day and what happened in the past. The seemingly innocent shortcut through the woods has a very interesting story behind it. It's somewhat believable and pretty intense. This is billed as a slasher film, but there isn't much gore at all, what there is doesn't come until much later in the film. The Shortcut won't win any awards, but it will certainly entertain you. It was fun and really is a lot more than it appears to be and I was pleasantly surprised.

House of Fears

Starring: Corri English, Michael Pagan, & Corey Sevier
Rating: 2 out of 5 stars

House of Fears was a pretty cool premise, but the movie was destroyed by a lame script and a cast that just wasn't very good. Some kids at a party decide to break into a haunted house exhibit, when suddenly their fears all come to life. It sounds like a good movie and that cover is great, but the story seemed to be written by a fourth grader. If you're over the age of ten and this film actually scared you, you should be ashamed of yourself. This is seriously about one step above Goosebumps. Aside from the childish script, the acting here is a complete joke! Muffled lines, fake screams, no emotion, I could go on all night about what was wrong with the acting in this film! It's got an awesome cover and very well written description, but the truth is this film is nothing but a waste of time, that you might find mildly entertaining, just because of how bad it really is.

Stolen (2009)

Starring: Josh Lucas, Jon Hamm, & Jimmy Bennett
Rating: 4 out of 5 stars

When you watch a lot of independent and direct-to-video films, you see a lot of garbage, but occasionally you find a gem that makes it all worthwhile, Stolen, is one of those gems. This story was so intriguing and well written that I was absolutely blown away. The film is about a detective whose son went missing, without a trace, eight years ago. The trail is cold and he's beginning to accept that he will never find him, when a local construction crew finds a boy in a box. The body has been there for at least fifty years, but the case awakens something in the detective who has to learn the truth. From there, quite ingeniously, the film is divided into three different stories, the story of the boy in the box, the detectives investigation, and the story of his own child. It was seriously like watching three different movies at once, and they were all great! The cast was pretty phenomenal too, as this was a very hard thing to pull off, but they did it seemingly with ease. Josh Lucas just blew my mind, giving an unrivaled performance as the father of the other missing boy. I've seen him in things before, but nothing was as memorable as this. Stolen is a film that consists of three stories in once, that will pull on your emotions and have you on the edge of your seat. It's one of the best films I've seen all year and I can't recommend it enough!

Medium Raw: Night of The Wolf

Starring: William Davis, John Rhys-Davis, & Bridgitte Kingsley
Rating: 2 1/2 out of 5 stars

This movie started out great and had such potential, but like many similar films, it eventually falls flat. In the beginning, we are introduced to a killer known as the wolf. Using Little Red Riding Hood as a tool, he's been on the loose for decades. At the same time, we are introduced to a local hospital for the worst of the worst of the criminally insane. This part of the film, was pure genius, as they came up with criminals that are the things nightmares are truly made of. Eventually there is a power failure at the facility and both stories are brought together to make up a rather less than exciting conclusion. The film started out being so unique and tremendous, but eventually becomes nothing more than a slasher film, it was truly disappointing. As for the cast, they were all a bunch of no-names, but they did an adequate job. The really upsetting thing about this film was just how quickly it went from a gem to a turd, it's like the film was written in parts by two separate people.

Hostel: Part III

Starring: Kip Pardue, Brian Hallisay, & Sarah Habel
Rating: 4 out of 5 stars

It took three films, but finally the new Hostel film initiated a marketable franchise. The first two films were about a bunch of travelers who got kidnapped and killed by millionaires, who were part of some human hunting club, but they didn't go any further than that. Finally, in Hostel III, we see inside the elite hunting club and learn it's purpose. Also unlike the first two films, this Hostel has a plot, that's interesting and apathetic. Featured in Hostel III is Kip Pardue, a veteran b-movie actor, and newcomer Brian Hallisay. They were humorous, likeable, and perfect for this type of film. After two insane gorefests, Hostel finally grew up and learned to combine the shocking violence with a good story, and a likeable cast. This was the by far the best Hostel film so far and one of the best horror movies I've seen all year. If you like horror, don't miss this one. Even if you didn't like the first two films, give this one a shot!

Thor

Starring: Chris Hemsworth, Natalie Portman, & Anthony Hopkins
Rating: 3 1/2 out of 5 stars

The great and powerful Thor was one of the biggest grossing movies of 2011. The special effects in this film were really some of the best I've ever seen and the star of the film, Chris Hemsworth was amazing, but besides that, this film was extremely overrated. Thor is banished to Earth for disobeying his father, the King, and must live as a mortal. Surprisingly, it doesn't take him very long to adjust, and he falls in love with Natalie Portman during a fifteen minute car ride. Okay, so the plot was weak to begin with, but the special effects could have more than made up for that. What I really didn't like about this film was just how fast everything happened. Thor is going to be in the Avengers trilogy and there is a good possibility there may be a sequel to this film, so what was the point in rushing everything? The character of Thor is a majestic one. He is one of the most powerful superheroes that ever existed. This film should have been the epic classic that was talked about for years, but instead they rushed the story and hid behind some great special effects. It was visually impactful, entertaining, and had a great star, but a side from that, this film is nothing more than a common theme with a weak script.

All Things Fall Apart

Starring: 50 Cent, Ray Liotta, & Mario Van Peebles
Rating: 1/2 out of 5 stars

I love sports movies, but when I saw that this one featured 50 cent, I really should have skipped it. I don't know what kind of rapper he is, but he is one terrible actor. The story wasn't anything special, but it was okay. It was the acting and dialogue that really destroyed this film. 50, has absolutely no personality, and every other word out of his mouth is either fuck or man. It was honestly the most ridiculous thing I've ever seen in a movie. This isn't a sports drama, it's a disaster that I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy!

Hero Wanted

Starring: Cuba Gooding Jr., Ray Liotta, & Norman Reedus
Rating: 3 1/2 out of 5 stars

Being that they do so much direct-to-video stuff, it's hard to remember that both Cuba Gooding Jr., and Ray Liotta are award winning actors! Hero Wanted is one of those direct-to-video films. It follows the story of a man who tries to live the righteous life, but even the best of people have their breaking point. This was a really interesting story, with some unexpected twists and turns. It was a pretty good film that really fell under the radar. The story was great and the acting was top notch, but the way it was filmed really left a lot to be desired. The film is frequently jumping months ahead or to a flashback, without any notice or footnotes, it made parts of the film very confusing. There were also a couple of pretty big plot holes, that added to the confusion. This is by no means a classic, but the acting was terrific, the action was pretty cool, and I enjoyed it quite a bit.